x dusks embrace [we find it hard to keep it] xX

[SHADE. :D]

xreservedx

The sun was sinking. A rosy wash of light bathed the EclipseClan camp in the hues of sunset; soft reds, gentle pinks and peachy oranges. The leaves glistened in the fading light, and a cold breeze shot by, reminding all of the closeness of winter. The camp was not deserted, but neither was it loud and bustling as it was usaully to be found. A few, quiet cats strolled over the short grass, either returning from a hunting trip, leading or being part of a new one, or simply enjoying the evening. A skinny cat sat outside the warriors' den, an untouched mouse between his forepaws. The tom's fur was unusaully short; it barely came further than his skin, and each rib showed. The warrior's short coat was a tan, sand colour, and his wide eyes were a dark, sun yellow. The tom had long, spindly legs and huge, bat like ears. Beacansong's eyes were fixed on the sinking sun, though it burnt his eyes. Burnt into them a picture of his past. Of Aspenkit. Of Lunardance. Of Fernpelt... Beacansong blinked, his reverie broken. No cat, especially not the beautiful EclipseClan deputy, would want to be his mate.

So stop dreaming.

[fernie. (:]

The ferns at the entrance to camp parted as the namesake padded through them. Fernpelt, bathed in dying sunlight, padded gracefully into camp, scanning the clearing quickly. Her leafy gaze lingered for a moment on one cat in particular. Beacansong, her old apprentice, was now a fine warrior. She had special feelings for that cat that she hadn't felt before. She dismissed it quickly- he would think her too old and serious for the likes of him. She depostited her catch on the fresh kill pile- a scrawny pigeon and a small vole. She took a chaffinch for herself and looked around again. She took a breath and padded over to Beacansong. 'Mind if I eat with you?' she asked in her high, quiet voice.

[SHADE. :D]

A soft voice, one Beacansong recognized, caused the tom to glance away from the setting ball of flames. The warrior blinked. Those warm, quiet tones belonged to Fernpelt. Clearing all emotion from his wide yellow eyes, Beacansong looked up. His gaze brushed Fernpelt's before he had to look away. Forcing a smile that looked as fake as it was onto his muzzle, the warrior nodded. "Of course," Beacansong mewed. His voice was quieter than usaul, and shook. To hide his embarrasment, the tom dipped his head. He sank his teeth into the mouse, taking a bite. He did not look up as he chewed, only lifting his head when he had hurriedly swallowed the mouthful, nearly choking. Beacansong blinked. "You okay?" he asked, his voice more like his own this time.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt sat down and started picking at her meal. She was feeling slightly awkward tonight too, her curled tail kept twitching, and she didn't know where to look. At Beacansong's question, she looked up. She chewed for a moment, then swallowed her mouthful. 'Yeah, fine thanks. You?' she asked, looking at her paws again. A soft breeze blew into camp, ruffling her patchy pelt. She shivered slightly, though not from cold.

[SHADE. :D]

The tom's yellow eyes never left Fernpelt's pretty face as she thought about his question. He noticed the tortoiseshell's glossy furred body tense, her green eyes flash with uncertainty. Beacansong's tail twitched in surprise. What was the matter with Fernpelt? He opened his mouth to ask, then stopped himself. He did not want to seem nosy. "That's good," he mewed, trying to sound normal despite his jangling heartstrings. "I'm okay, too. Just a bit tired. I've been hunting most of the day." Beacansong noticed Fernpelt still looked uncomfortable and a little upset. In a sudden surge of pity, Beacansong brushed her ear with his nose. "It's okay," he mewed. "Whatever's up, if you want to talk, I'm here." The young tom then drew back hastily, mortified at what he had just done, and returned to his meal. He took swift bites, nearly choking. He was desperate to get away from Fernpelt. His pelt prickled with embarrasment.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt was put slightly more at ease when Beacansong said he would be there for here, but her eyes narrowed as the tom started wolfing down his meal as if she was a bad smell he wanted to get away from. She took an offended glance at him and proceded to bury the rest of her meal. 'I don't feel too well, I think I'm going to go and lie down.' she said, dragging out each word as though it was an effort. It wasn't exactly a lie that she had told; she did feel terrible, but it wasn't an ill sort of terrible. It was an aching under her patched pelt, and the deputy couldn't get a look of confusion and bewilderment off her face as she stood up.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong caught the look of reassurance in Fernpelt's eyes, and flashed a smile at her. Maybe they were getting somewhere! But then the tortoiseshell's eyes narrowed, and Beacansong choked. The tom felt dismay grow inside of him as the she-cat moved away. The skinny warrior let out a long sigh and dropped his head onto his thin forepaws. You idiot. What'd you do that for? You've just blown everything - including your friendship. What an idiot. What a stupid, stupid idiot. Beacansong pushed his meal away, getting to his paws. He pushed his way into the warriors' den and curled up there, on his nest. He felt the fern fronds tickle his thin pelt and a wave of hatred washed through him. Not hatred of Fernpelt, but of himself. Him and his stupid super-short fur, bulging yellow eyes and batty ears. His stupid, spindly long legs and bald tail. His rubbish attitude. Beacansong buried his muzzle in the velvety skin on his stomach, hoping to hide himself from the world.
No one wants to see me, anyway...

[fernie. (:]

ooc; Awwww!!
bic; Fernpelt looked up from where she was silently curling up into her nest. She saw Beacansong follow her in, and curl up in his won nest. She would correct herself if she was mistaken, but Beacansong looked as miserable as she felt. She sighed and got up again, sitting down beside him. She nudged him gently with her curled tail, attempting a smile. 'It looks to me like you're the one who needs someone to talk to.' she said quietly.

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[SHADE. :D]

The tom felt a single tear pass from his closed eyes. This was not like all the other many tears he had cried in his life; not warm as it slid down his cheek, but cold. Icy cold, the same cold as snowmelt. It stayed on the tom's cheek for a moment, before falling onto a forepaw and wetting his fur. Beacansong felt a soft something brush his flank, and pricked up his large, wide pointed ears. The young warrior blinked, peering up over the rim of his crossed forepaws. Fernpelt. The tortoiseshell looked unhapp, but the corners of her lips were twitching. Beacansong sank back into his hide-hole, muttering as he went; "I'm fine." The tom hoped Fernpelt would accept his answer, though he had a feeling the plucky she-cat would not. Beacansong curled up tighter. He wished he had slipped away before Fernpelt had first approached him. She didn't need him.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt sighed quietly and lay down beside Beacansong, smiling sadly at him. Her head sank down onto her creamy paws and she closed her eyes for a second, before opening them again, pupils huge in the dim warriors den. 'You sure about that?' she asked, blowing at Beacansong to try to make him uncurl himself. 'You can tell me, you know.' she whispered, making herself barely audible.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong felt Fernpelt's presence beside him. He wanted to move closer, but at the same time he wanted to recoil. So instead he just quivered with indecision. He jumped, as though stung by a wasp, as Fernpelt's soft breath caressed his flank. The tan coloured tom finally uncurled, and turned his sad, wet yellow eyes onto the cat he loved. Beacansong's body still remained awkwardly tangled, spindly legs folded over one another and tail flattened beneath limbs and body. The tom bit his lip until he tasted blood, then opened his mouth. "It's just..." the tom hesitated. "It's just me. I'm the problem. Not you, or anybody else. Me." Beacansong turned and licked the lumpy scars on his pelt, flinching as he remebered looking at his reflection in a puddle. He remembered insults he had recieved as a kit. Bat-ears.. Bald-pelt.. Frog-eyes...

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt watched as Beacansong slowly unfurled himself. She sighed, as he said what he did, and licked her old apprentice's cheek softly. 'What's wrong with you?' She asked, putting her tail around his shoulders. She was trying to comfort the young tom, because she hated to see any cat like this. 'Beacansong, you're an amazingly talented cat, and you're a real help to the Clan. I know I for one wouldn't feel the same if you weren't here.' she said.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong twitched his tail sullenly, trying not to stubbornly curl up again. He felt hate tinge his very spirit, hate for himself. Hate so strong that it brought a bitter taste to the tip of his tongue. The tan coloured tom rasped his tongue over his forepaws, partly because of the taste and partly because Fernpelt's beautiful green-eyed stare was making him feel awkward and nervous. Beacansong tensed as she spoke. "I... I just..." the tom broke off. The tom's insides lurched at the tortoiseshell deputy's soft words. I wouldn't feel the same if you wern't here... He wanted nothing more than to reply, 'same here', but the words would not come. Instead, he burbled something miserably. "I can never be what I wish to be," he murmured. "A father, or a mate to somebody. Who would want to be my mate? I'm an outsider. StarClan lumped all the bad bits together and I came out." Beacansong's head flopped onto his forepaws, his large ears dlapping into his eyes.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt narrowed her eyes at Beacansong. 'You're wallowing in self-pity and you know it.' she said, looking him straight in the eye. 'I would love a mate like you, a great warrior, and friendly too. Only, no cat like you would take me 'cause I'd be too old and grumpy for them.' she said, staring mournfully down at her own paws and thinking about how true her words were, as if she were admitting to herself that she had strong feelings for her old apprentice. 'You'll find the right cat one day, and she'll love you for who you are, not what you look like.' she said, tears welling in her green eyes as she found herself wishing she would be that cat, the one.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong hung his head at her words. She was right, and he knew it. He should be glad of what he had, not pine after things that would never be his. The tom's heart skipped a beat at Fernpelt's next words. He looked at her, forgetting to breathe. But then she went on, and desperation winged through Beacansong's mind. "Your not old," he mewed. The tom stared at his paws, before jerking up his head. "And I'd never turn you down because your beautiful," he burst out. Beacansong shut his eyes, smarting. He then stared straight at Fernpelt, eyes seeking out feelings. He was not going to offend her this time. Beacansong felt a tiny thought prick the back of his mind; I'm glad the warriors' den is empty...

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt looked up from her paws as Beacansong spoke again. Her eyes widened slightly as he said what he did, and she could feel herself blushing beneath her patched pelt. 'Th-thank you.' she whispered simply. 'Beacansong, you're a great friend to me, and I really don't want to spoil that by having feelings more than that. But, the truth is, I do.' she said, her voice getting quieter and quieter. 'But I don't want our friendship to be ruined if you don't feel the same way.' she added, looking down at her paws once more.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong's heart lifted, until it rested on what felt like the highest cloud. A small smile fixed itself on the tom's face, contrary to Fernpelt's worried frown. He could not believe how wrong he had been. The young warrior nuzzled Fernpelt's cheek. "I..." he hesitated. "I do feel the same way." Beacansong smiled awkwardly at his former mentor, love blossoming in his heart. "That's why I was so... Difficult." The tom licked his chest. "This won't ruin our friendship. We don't have to do anything, if you don't want to. Nothing has to change between us, if you don't want it to. We can still be the same." Though he disagreed with his words, Beacansong felt an impulse to utter them. It was Fernpelt's choice what happened from here on. He was not a stubborn kit or a moody apprentice anymore. He was a warrior. Beacansong stared at Fernpelt, wondering what she would say. He wanted nothing more than to stand at her side and call her his mate, and him her's, but it was her choice.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt closed her eyes for a second, savouring the moment. When they opened again they were filled with joy. She twined her tail with Beacansong's and nodded at his words. 'I know things don't need to change. I want them to.' she said, her heart swelling to twice its size beneath her snowy chest fur. She stood up, her pelt brushing Beacansong's and her heart beating faster than it normally would.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong felt a purr choke him, and let it out. He shut his eyes, nuzzling against Fernpelt's soft throat. When the tortoiseshell rose, he rose with her, his long, skinny tail twined with her's. "What will the clan think?" he mewed. He knew that his mother, Scrawltale, would be incredibly happy for him and proud that he had found a mate. Beacansong licked Fernpelt's muzzle. He no longer felt jealous of his sister, Sunheart, who had a mate and kits of her own. The young warrior pressed his short haired flank against Fernpelt. "So, what next?" he asked. Who should they tell? Should they keep it a secret?

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt let out a purr too, a soft, rasping purr. 'Who cares what the Clan think? It's what we feel that matters.' she said, smiling. She contemplated Beacansong's next question, padding over to stand by the camp entrance. She gazed out at the frosty day, not feeling cold at all. 'I don't know.' she said, looking back into the den. 'I suppose we just... go for it.' she said simply, then beckoning with erh tail.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong could not prevent a smile from moving his lips as Fernpelt spoke passionately. The young tom watched her as she padded from the den, still admiring the sheen of her beautiful tortoiseshell pelt, the slenderness of her body and legs and the healthy sparkle in her bright green eyes. Beacansong flicked his long, skinny tail, emerging from the warriors' den. He noticed the tip of Fernpelt's patched tail curve, beckoning him. Beacansong trotted to her side, as though pulled by magic. The warrior pressed himself against Fernpelt, defiantly, twining his tail with her's and licking her silky cheek, yellow eyes hot with determination.

Two cats padded into camp. One looked like Beacansong, but as though a few deliberate mistakes had been made. Her ears were a little bigger, and wider. her legs more stout and her fur coloured a rustic bronze hue. A jay dangled from her tightly closed mouth. Beside her padded a grey and white cat, his strong shoulders hunched and two mice hanging from his jaws. Both warriors' turned to face Fernpelt and Beacansong as they entered the camp. Scrawltale's yellow eyes widened, then her jaws parted, releasing the jay. A mew of delight escaped her throat, and her tail raised. Spectrumflash did a double take, dropping the mice so that bounced off his chest. The warrior blinked a couple of times. Never had he seen such an unlikely couple, and he could not help staring.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt nuzzled Beacansong's own cheek, brushing her pelt against his then turning her green gaze on the two cats entering camp. Her face couldn't help breaking into a huge smile, and she padded over to the two warriors. Her whiskers twitched with amusement at their reaction to her and Beacansong. 'Hello Scrawltale, Spectrumflash. How are you both today?' she asked, still smiling broadly. She felt like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders, and felt as though she could be floating. She looked at the two cats, happiness dancing across her gaze as she awaited their answer.

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[SHADE. :D]

Beacansong padded forward to stand beside Fernpelt, leaning over to touch his nose to Scrawltale's. He smiled at his mother's dumb joy, and Spectrumflash's look of stunned shock. The tan coloured tom sat back on his haunches as his mate spoke. He smiled at the tortoiseshell. His mate. She wasn't just Fernpelt anymore, a friend whom he secretly loved. She was his mate. Beacansong lifted his tail in happiness, sun yellow eyes glowing. He could not wait to tell Sunheart, and Gillwing, and... Well, everybody.

Scrawltale purred loudly. "I'm just fine, thanks," she replied brightly, her ears pricked high. The bronze coloured she-cat licked a paw and swiped it between her ears. Her short fur did not get any flatter. Spectrumflash sat still, dumbfounded. He was not sure if he had really heard Fernpelt speak or not. Obviously. She was looking at him and Scrawltale. Swallowing, Spectrumflash blinked, attempting to regain some face. "I'm... Good," he mewed weakly, swallowing.

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt smiled as Beacansong joined them. 'Great.' She said, perhaps more enthusiastically than she would normally. She couldn't get the dazed smile off her face, and must have looked slightly mad. She looked at Spectrumflash, smiling even wider at his response. 'You two have been busy.' she said, looking at the prey now lying in the dirt, where the two cats had dropped them.

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[(aurora) of the problematique]

<sub>"Have you been made leader without me knowing?" came a jovial, sarcastic voice that could have only belonged to one cat: Solsticesong. She wanted to know what the commotion and overall happy-happy-joy-joy feeling was about.

The fluffy femme wagged her tail left to right as she approached her best friend and deputy. She smiled cordially at Beacansong and dipped her head to Spectrumflash and Scrawltale. She twitched her feather-like black tail to the nursery. "I was just checking out Sunheart's kits. You should be very proud," she said, twitching her ear as she looked at both Beacansong and Scrawltale's directions.

Then Solsticesong turned to Fernpelt, tilting her sable-helmetted head. The mostly off-white she-cat raised her brows, not even having to ask what was going on once she was near the two of them. She suddenly smiled broadly at Fernpelt and brushed her broad shoulder against that of the pretty she-cat deputy. "Well then, congratulations. Make sure I mentor one when you two decide to hit the hay, yes?" She grinned impishly.</sub>

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt smiled as soon as she heard the voice of her bubbly friend. 'Hello! No, Amethyststar's gone to Moonshard, remember?' she said, touching her nose to Solsticesong's. The friendly she-cats next comment made Fernpelt laugh out loud. 'You really know how to word things to make them sound good, don't you!' she said, her sea green gaze dancing with amusement.

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[(aurora) of the problematique]

_{Solsticesong smirked and nodded. "Well, only a couple things can make a cat beam like you're doing and becoming leader is one of those options. Let's just hope Corbynpaw doesn't assassinate her on the way back," she said dryly, just as sarcastic as always. When Fernpelt laughed, the fluffy she-cat chuckled and nodded. "And that's why we're friends, right?" She brushed her broom-like tail across Fernpelt, towering over the other she-cat. She remembered like it was yesterday, becoming friends with Fernpaw because no one else wanted to. Solsticepaw was always the one to be the maverick around here, though Sunheart's tomkit Maverickkit would give her a run for her squirrels on that.}

[fernie. (:]

Fernpelt laughed again, her high, soft laugh breaking the all but silence in the clearing. 'Ah, Corbynpaw. I can't figure that cat out.' she sighed, eyebrows furrowed as she thought of the stubborn, self absorbed tom. 'He'll be tricky to mentor, that's for sure.' she sighed. Fernpelt took the bemused expression off her face, replacing it with a warm smile aimed at Solsicesong, who had been there for her when no-one else was.
She had been the cat that walked in when the rest of the world walked out.

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[(aurora) of the problematique]

<sub>Solsticesong shook her head. "Neither can I," she said wistfully. She suddenly smiled. "Perhaps I should knock him in the head a couple times?" She waved her fluffy paw and suddenly slapped the ground with it as if she was hitting a beetle. She straightened with a laugh and then tilted her head to Fernpelt.

"If your man doesn't mind, can I steal you away for some patrolling?" she asked with a gentle smile.

((Letting Shade post now ^^; ))</sub>

[fernie. (:]

[[Shadeeeeee]]

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